LMFAO 😂 🤪 🤣
Brian’s mother: He’s not the Messiah. He’s a very naughty boy! Now, piss off!
Monty Python – Life of Brian – Alright I am the Messiah
— How shall we f**k off oh lord?
Monty Python’s Life of Brian
All right, I am the Messiah!
Crowd: He is! He is the Messiah!
Brian: Now, fuck off! [Silence]
Arthur: How shall we fuck off, oh Lord?
Brian: Please, please, please listen! I’ve got one or two things to say.
The Crowd: Tell us! Tell us both of them!
Brian: Look, you’ve got it all wrong! You don’t NEED to follow ME, You don’t NEED to follow ANYBODY! You’ve got to think for your selves! You’re ALL individuals!
The Crowd: Yes! We’re all individuals!
Brian: You’re all different!
The Crowd: Yes, we ARE all different!
Man in crowd: I’m not…
The Crowd: Sch!
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Reg: All right, but apart from the sanitation, medicine, education, wine, public order, irrigation, roads, the fresh water system and public health, what have the Romans ever done for us?
Attendee: Brought peace?
Reg: Oh, peace – shut up!
Reg: There is not one of us who would not gladly suffer death to rid this country of the Romans once and for all.
Dissenter: Uh, well, one.
Reg: Oh, yeah, yeah, there’s one. But otherwise, we’re solid.
Brian: Excuse me. Are you the Judean People’s Front?
Reg: Fuck off! ‘Judean People’s Front’. We’re the People’s Front of Judea! ‘Judean People’s Front’.
Francis: Wankers.
Stan: It’s every man’s right to have babies if he wants them.
Reg: But you can’t have babies.
Stan: Don’t you oppress me.
Reg: Where’s the fetus going to gestate? You going to keep it in a box?
Pontius Pilate: So, yaw fatha was a Woman? Who was he?
Brian: He was a Centurion, in the Jerusalem Garrisons.
Pontius Pilate: Weally? What was his name?
Brian: ‘Naughtius Maximus’.
[the Centurion laughs]
Pontius Pilate: Centuwion, do we have anyone of that name in the gawwison?
Centurion: Well, no, sir.
Pontius Pilate: Well, you sound vewy sure. Have you checked?
Centurion: Well, no, sir. Umm, I think it’s a joke, sir… like, uh, ‘Sillius Soddus’ or… ‘Biggus Dickus’, sir.
Pontius Pilate: [guard chuckles] What’s so funny about “Biggus Dickus? ”
Centurion: Well, it’s a joke name, sir.
Pontius Pilate: I have a vewy gweat fwiend in Wome called ‘Biggus Dickus’.
[guard chuckles]
Pontius Pilate: Silence! What is all this insolence? You will find yourself in gladiator school vewy quickly with wotten behaviour like that.
Brian: Can I go now, sir?
[slap]
Brian: Aaah! Eh.
Pontius Pilate: Wait till Biggus Dickus hears of this!
[guard chuckles]
Pontius Pilate: Wight! Take him away!
Centurion: Oh, sir, he – he only…
Pontius Pilate: No, no. I want him fighting wabid, wild animals within a week.
Centurion: Yes, sir. Come on, you.
[takes the guard away as continues laughing histerically]
Pontius Pilate: I will not have my fwiends widiculed by the common soldiewy. – – Anybody else feel like a little… giggle… when I mention my fwiend… Biggus…
[another guard chuckles]
Pontius Pilate: … Dickus?
[more chuckling]
Pontius Pilate: What about you? Do you find it… wisible… when I say the name… ‘Biggus’…
[chuckle]
Pontius Pilate: … Dickus?
[both guards chuckle]
Pontius Pilate: He has a wife, you know. You know what she’s called? She’s called… ‘Incontinentia’… Incontinentia Buttocks
Pontius Pilate: [Guards are laughing] Stop! What is all this?
Pontius Pilate: [laughing continues] I’ve had enough of this wowdy webel sniggewing behaviour. Silence! Call yourselves Pwaetowian guards? You’re not – Seize him! Seize him! Blow your noses and seize him!
When it comes to writing if you don’t love it, don’t do it lmfao 🤣 😂 🤪
“Don’t try and varnish a boat while building it!”
generalkirigan #flyingmonkeys #parentalalienation #entiteled #compulsiveliar #smearcampaign #goldenuterus #darkling #narcissisticmother #divorcinganarcissist #silenttreatment #childrenarethevictims #toxicwife #easyvirtue #thebigwedding #biggathanben #thewords #psychopath #narcissisticprincess #love #hbo #memes #siriusblack #instagood #aleksandermorozova #binbons #style #sociopath #golddiggerprank #tomward
Never get married. It’ll only end in divorce. The statistics don’t lie.
100% of divorces started with marriage. Can’t say I didn’t warn you.
How many divorced men does it take to change a light bulb?
No one knows. They never get to keep the house.
Getting divorced just because you don’t love a woman is almost as silly
as getting married just because you do.
“Having a few close friends is way better than having 100’s of fake friends” 🤙🏁
RIGS & REEFS 